Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.
In every big city there is always one surefire laugh, and that lies in hanging some piece of idiocy upon the people of a nearby city or town.
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.