Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.

The two-headed boy in the circus never had such a headache.

All my available funds are completely tied up in cash.

I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.

It's what you do that counts and not what you say; therefore I fired my press agent.