How is the human race going to survive now that the cost of living has gone up two dollars a quart?
I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.
I can do anything I want to do!
The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .
Buried my wife the other day. Had to, she died.
You can fool some of the people some of the time -- and that's enough to make a decent living.