I once donated a pint of my finest red corpuscles to the great American Red Cross and the doctor opined my blood was very helpful; contained so much alcohol they could use it to sterilize their instruments.

To me, these biblical stories are just so many fish stories, and I'm not specifically referring to Jonah and the whale. I need indisputable proof of anything I'm asked to believe.

I have a poor memory for names; but I seldom remember a face.

Somebody's been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!

Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.

It's quite true I'm not drinking anymore; however, I'm not drinking any less either.

I'm looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.).