That word sassy - it haunts me. I keep getting the sassy thing.

Yeah, I had top-secret clearance and everything.

I always want to go back and do stand-up; I like the freedom.

L.A. is nothing but a bunch of driving, and I hate all that damn driving 'cause it interferes with my drinking.

Writers get to stay with the piece. They don't just turn the script in and somebody else takes it over and goes out and produces it and edits it and all that stuff. We stay with the piece all the way through.

My neighbor, she invited me to an Elvis party. I told her I couldn't come 'cause I'd be too busy making fun of her from behind my blinds.

My worlds collide. When one things happens, it just starts a domino effect - everything else goes on.