All these teenagers tell us how much they want to grow up and then when they do they want to be young again.

Once you start making money, you can be an ass. But I am not an ass. I'm too lazy, that takes a lot of energy.

I had top-secret clearance and everything. I was working on a couple of projects that would keep me involved in Desert Storm. I was in the mix, which is scary.

And then also I think it's harder for women because comedy is so opposite of being ladylike.

I always had one goal, and that was to be a real funny stand-up comic, and that's pretty much what I'm doing. And everything else is kind of like gravy - TV, movies.

Usually, there's nothing being thrown toward the stage or at me. Then I feel pretty good about it.

I'm always thinking of stuff; I just don't sit down and write it. I come up with material more as I go along; if something funny happens, I'll make a note of it on my phone.