It seems like when I first started, people got into comedy because they wanted to be good comedians.

I always had one goal, and that was to be a real funny stand-up comic, and that's pretty much what I'm doing. And everything else is kind of like gravy - TV, movies.

I guess because of my act, people think that I say things they want to say, and that they can just come up and say anything to me.

I like doing a bunch of different things, being all over the place.

I think the worst one [indian mascot] is the Cleveland Indians' Big Chief Wahoo. It's just a red face on a baseball with a big, toothy grin. It's the Sambo of all other offensive mascots. I have never seen a Native American smile that hard before, not even at a casino opening.

Yeah, I had top-secret clearance and everything.

I knew something was wrong with the economy when the shampoo girl at my salon closed on a six bedroom house.