These CEOs, man ... If you're that ruthless, you're a scary dude. I tell you, now when I walk past a little gang banger, I don't even blink. But if I see a white dude with a Wall Street Journal, I haul ass. Before I walk past the Arthur Andersen building, I cut through the projects. If you cut through the projects, you may just lose what you have on you that day. I ain't never been mugged of my whole future.

I enjoy stand-up because it has the biggest reward: instant gratification. You can hear the people laughing.

When my parents send me emails the first 3 are blank.

I'm proud to be a woman. I'm proud to be a black woman, and I'm proud to be gay.

I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance.

When life gives you lemons don't make lemonade, make pink lemonade. Be unique.

I'm always thinking of stuff; I just don't sit down and write it. I come up with material more as I go along; if something funny happens, I'll make a note of it on my phone.