There's times when I'm really shy, so these roles that I get to play, they're how I would love to really be. And that's why I love doing stand-up, because it gives me the freedom to say what I really want to say. I think that's why it's my favorite thing to do.

Mostly everything gets worse before it gets better.

I enjoy stand-up because it has the biggest reward: instant gratification. You can hear the people laughing.

I always had one goal, and that was to be a real funny stand-up comic, and that's pretty much what I'm doing. And everything else is kind of like gravy - TV, movies.

I'm always thinking of stuff; I just don't sit down and write it. I come up with material more as I go along; if something funny happens, I'll make a note of it on my phone.

That word sassy - it haunts me. I keep getting the sassy thing.

If you don't believe in same-sex marriage, then don't marry somebody of the same sex.