A hermit is simply a person to whom civilization has failed to adjust itself.

The hippopotamus looks monogamous- he looks as if he would have to be.

If a cat does something, we call it instinct; if we do the same thing, for the same reason, we call it intelligence.

Just when you're beginning to think pretty well of people, you run across somebody who puts sugar on sliced tomatoes.

The moral of the story of the Pilgrims is that if you work hard all your life and behave yourself every minute and take no time out for fun you will break practically even, if you can borrow enough money to pay your taxes.

I do not travel. I am not much of an extrovert, and I'm not much interested in extroverted objects. I do not care for the 'ideas' of novelists. Novels are wonderful, of course, but I prefer newspapers.

The stork is voiceless because there is really nothing to say.