In San Francisco, Haloween is redundant.

It's okay to laugh in the bedroom so long as you don't point

Men are superior to women. For one thing, men can urinate from a speeding car.

Well, we won the war. You know what that means. In twenty years, we'll all be driving Iraqi cars

Everybody says not enough people vote. Now, I don't know nothing, but after the midterms, pretty obvious to me, that too many people vote.

It is my experience that the best way to deal with American politics is 50 milligrams of Zoloft 3 times a day.

President Bush says we've turned the corner in Iraq. What is that, about 16 corners we've turned? I think they call that running in circles.