Well, we won the war. You know what that means. In twenty years, we'll all be driving Iraqi cars

Budget cuts if you're not rich, tax cuts if you are. Less money for those who don't have any and more to those who do. That's how President Fredo says we're going to get out of the giant deficit hole he's dug. You can't put it any more simply. Rich people richer. Poor people poorer.

Well, we won the war. You know what that means. In twenty years, we'll all be driving Iraqi cars

It is my experience that the best way to deal with American politics is 50 milligrams of Zoloft 3 times a day.

There is humor in the specter of the worst disaster in our nation's history. All I have to do is sweep away the debris of shock to find it.

Everybody says not enough people vote. Now, I don't know nothing, but after the midterms, pretty obvious to me, that too many people vote.

The problem is, we have yet to convince the Taliban they are fellow passengers on spaceship Earth.