The reason the Democrats are so intent on passing a stem-cell bill is they're depending on the research to grow themselves a spine.

Everybody says not enough people vote. Now, I don't know nothing, but after the midterms, pretty obvious to me, that too many people vote.

Well, we won the war. You know what that means. In twenty years, we'll all be driving Iraqi cars

The problem is, we have yet to convince the Taliban they are fellow passengers on spaceship Earth.

In San Francisco, Haloween is redundant.

Voters want a fraud they can believe in.

When people talk about how in America, anybody can grow up to be President, I'm not sure George Bush is exactly what they had in mind.