It's okay to laugh in the bedroom so long as you don't point

You can't kill America. We're more than a nation. We're a notion. We're an idea. The American Dream. You never heard of the Afghanistani Dream have you. Except by bearded hermetic recluses with a fetish for uneducated women dressed as giant shuttlecocks.

There is humor in the specter of the worst disaster in our nation's history. All I have to do is sweep away the debris of shock to find it.

The reason the Democrats are so intent on passing a stem-cell bill is they're depending on the research to grow themselves a spine.

Voters want a fraud they can believe in.

I hate the outdoors. To me the outdoors is where the car is.

President Bush says we've turned the corner in Iraq. What is that, about 16 corners we've turned? I think they call that running in circles.