It is my experience that the best way to deal with American politics is 50 milligrams of Zoloft 3 times a day.

It's okay to laugh in the bedroom so long as you don't point

Comedy is defiance. It's a snort of contempt in the face of fear and anxiety. And it's the laughter that allows hope to creep back on the inhale.

Voters want a fraud they can believe in.

President Bush says we've turned the corner in Iraq. What is that, about 16 corners we've turned? I think they call that running in circles.

When people talk about how in America, anybody can grow up to be President, I'm not sure George Bush is exactly what they had in mind.

The administration says the American people want tax cuts. Well, duh. The American people also want drive-through nickel beer night. The American people want to lose weight by eating ice cream. The American people love the Home Shopping Network because it's commercial-free.