Budget cuts if you're not rich, tax cuts if you are. Less money for those who don't have any and more to those who do. That's how President Fredo says we're going to get out of the giant deficit hole he's dug. You can't put it any more simply. Rich people richer. Poor people poorer.

Voters want a fraud they can believe in.

It is my experience that the best way to deal with American politics is 50 milligrams of Zoloft 3 times a day.

The problem is, we have yet to convince the Taliban they are fellow passengers on spaceship Earth.

Comedy is defiance. It's a snort of contempt in the face of fear and anxiety. And it's the laughter that allows hope to creep back on the inhale.

I hate the outdoors. To me the outdoors is where the car is.

How did sex come to be thought of as dirty in the first place? God must have been a Republican.