In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time.

It's the fellow who knows when to quit that the audience wants more of.

We have the best Congress that money can buy.

Everytime a lawyer writes something, he is not writing for posterity, he is writing something so that endless others of his craft can make a living out of trying to figure out what he said. Course perhaps he really haden't said anything, that's what makes it so hard to explain.

Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.

We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by.

Communism to me is one-third practice and two-thirds explanation.