Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.
It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.
If Wall Street paid a tax on every “game” they run, we would get enough revenue to run the government on.
America is the first country where people go to the poor house in their car.
We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.
Invest in inflation. It is the only thing going up.