Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.

Will Rogers used to say he wouldn't run for president no matter how badly the country needed a comedian.

They call it the Latin Quarter because nobody there is Latin and nobody has a quarter.

Politicians are just a bunch of local bandits, sent by their local voters to raid the public treasury.

Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.

I'll bet you the time ain't far off when a woman won't know any more than a man.

So the question rises: How much liberty can you get away with? Well, you get no more liberty than you give!