Side Effects Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on the weekend. Woody Allen Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying. I don't want to live on in the hearts of my countrymen; I want to live on in my apartment.

Once the movie's over, there's not much point. When the thing is edited, mixed, and color-corrected, and you've finished it... In my case, I never read anything about it, I never think about it.

You're so good looking I can barely keep my eyes on the meter.

I'm short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own.

Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.