When you travel around the country, you see what a tough town New York is: rude, competitive, a town where good, logical ideas are ignored in favor of unworkable ones. And yet, all these other towns are so dead and boring compared to New York.

I prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.

I read in self-defense.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

I don't like theatrical actors and actresses. I like people that talk like real human beings.

That’s one of the nice things about writing, or any art; if the thing’s real, it just lives.

If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.