I didn't know he was dead; I thought he was British.

Umlaut snaps around and we cut to a blond apparition in her early twenties, clearly descended from Olympus by way of Hugh Hefner's mansion.

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

Existence for eternity could get a little boring... especially towards the end.

I never knew what Amazon was. I've never seen any of those series, even on cable. I've never seen The Sopranos, or Mad Men. I'm out every night and when I come home, I watch the end of the baseball or basketball game, and there's Charlie Rose and I go to sleep.

Meanwhile, the minute you put on the dotted line your Sam Hancock - and before a notary - you'll not only get the negative but Elsie makes a wonderful stuffed cabbage which we'll include gratis a few portions but return the jars please.

I was in analysis for years because of a traumatic childhood; I was breast-fed through falsies.