Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.

In real life, Keaton believes in God. But she also believes that the radio works because there are tiny people inside it.

If you meet somebody and are attracted to someone, and the exquisite neurons in your brain and her brain intermesh properly, then things can be wonderful. It's not like homework. You don't have to work at the relationship.

I didn't believe in reincarnation in my past life, and I still don't.

I can't enjoy anything unless everybody is. If one guy is starving someplace, that puts a crimp in my evening.

You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.