That’s one of the nice things about writing, or any art; if the thing’s real, it just lives.

Cynicism is reality with an alternate spelling.

It's just gossip, you know. Gossip is the new pornography.

The French make two mistakes about me. They think I'm an intellectual because I wear these glasses and they think I'm an artist because my films lose money.

Can you believe that? She says I'm not leader enough for her. Who was she looking for... Hitler?

If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.

Some men are heterosexual and some men are bisexual and some men don't think about sex at all ... you know, they become lawyers.