When I'm writing something, if there's a part that's good for me, then I'll play it. Otherwise, I don't. And I notice that there are less and less parts for me in my own writing.

When I asked my mother where babies came from, she thought I said rabies. She said you get them from being bitten by a dog. The next week, a woman on my block gave birth to triplets... I thought she'd been bitten by a Great Dane.

I believe in sex and death- two experiences that come once in a lifetime.

There's nothing good about getting older-absolutely nothing-because the amount of wisdom and experience you gain is negligible compared to what you lose. You do gain a couple of things-you gain a little bittersweet and sour wisdom from your heartbreaks and failures and things-but what you lose is so catastrophic in every way.

There's no way to prove that there is no God. You just have to take it on faith.

I can't understand why more people aren't bisexual. It would double your chances for a date on Saturday night.

If I could change the structure of existence I would do it. I could see a better way to live for everybody.