Between the Pope and air conditioning, I'd choose air conditioning.

I have one last request. Don't use embalming fluid on me; I want to be stuffed with crab meat.

You use sex to express every emotion except love.

Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.

Life is full of moments that are good - winning a lottery, seeing a beautiful woman, a great dinner - but the whole thing is tragic. It's an oasis that is very pleasant.

You know how you're always trying to get things to come out perfect in art because it's real difficult in life

Some drink deeply from the river of knowledge. Others only gargle.