Reality may not be the best of all possible worlds, but it's still the only place where you can get a decent steak.

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.

I should have known something was wrong with my first wife. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved of her.

Drama, it would be as if you wrote some poetry. You'd run the risk of being embarrassed if people read it, because you're pouring your heart out and you're not mitigating it with any humor or anything.

The artist can't give you an answer that's satisfying to the dreadful reality of your existence. So the best you can do is maybe entertain people and refresh them for an hour-and-a-half.

I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or it dies.

I got a divorce because my ex-wife left me for another woman.