I was a smart kid and I was not understood by my parents.

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.

I've inherited the worst of each parent. I have my father's hypochondria and lack of concentration. I have his amorality. I have everything bad that he had. Then I have my mother's surly, pill-like, complaining, whining attitude.

Honey, you're the one who stopped sleeping with me, OK? It'll be a year come April 20th. I remember the date exactly, because it was Hitler's birthday

Right now it's only a notion, but I think I can get the money to make it into a concept, and later turn it into an idea.

I was walking through the woods, thinking about Christ. If He was a carpenter, I wondered what He charged for bookshelves.

I don't inhale because it gives you cancer, but I look so incredibly handsome with a cigarette that I can't not hold one.