When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.

I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.

Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection.

In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!

The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.

In America, you assassinate president. In Soviet Russia, president assassinate you!

Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.