In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!

In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!

I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.

Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.

I came to America to make it my home, and I did.

Never having alone time is real tough on people.

Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.