In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.

A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.

I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.

Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.

Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.

In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!