In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!

I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.

I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else.

If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.

Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.

Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.