The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.

I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.

Never having alone time is real tough on people.

A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.

In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!

I came to America to make it my home, and I did.

In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.