They don't know I'm staring, what does it matter if I keep on doing it?

There's a lot of gray area in the law. Who can say, without a doubt, that I was in the wrong?

Complete garbage. It's like Garden State, but in outer space.

You know I was just taking a dump one day, and then as I sat there I realized, I really do deserve better.

It's not that I'm racist or anything, because I'm not, but I just don't think we should be wasting our time helping people that are going to die soon anyway.

If John McCain were really a war hero he would've won Vietnam.

I mean, so what if it's a little dangerous? A one-armed kid is comedy gold.