The only women I publicly date are those who have a higher IMDB rating than me.

One time this guy on the street wanted me to give him a medical opinion, because I'm a doctor on TV. I'm also a real doctor. But I'm also Zack Braff, so I kicked him in the groin.

I really do take more vacations than the president. You can quote me on that.

Let's face it, it's only called Scrubs because I'm saving 'Zach Braff' for my autobiography.

After all meat is meat. I don't understand why so many people are bithing about it. It's very healthy and contains lots of vitamins

I don't want to blame it all on 9/11, but it certainly didn't help matters.

My favorite meal? It has to be furburgers everyday in the morning.