I like hot dogs. I like eggplant. I like pizza and creamed corn and beer. But I don't like Arabs.

I don't think it's that bad, I mean, I love people following me around and helping me do stuff.

Of course I don't use my A-material, it doesn't matter if they think I'm funny or not because they won't be thinking anything pretty soon anyways, if you caych my drift.

When I was little I always wanted to drive a train. That, and become a baker.

The Jews are just clumsy bakers.

I never go looking for child pornography, but I mean, if somebody sends me an email with some pictures, I'm not going to turn around and report them.

Its not that I'm in love with myself, I'm just trying to pick up everyone else's slack.