Women have the right to choose what do with their own bodies. They can take it in the cooch or in the pooper. But that's where their right to choose stops, in my opinion.

I never really understood all the hype, until I got one of my own.

Working on 'Scrubs' made me feel guilty because I realized that if I had decided to become an actual doctor, instead of just playing one, I could probably have found a cure to cancer within five years.

I have a great relationship with my parents. I have not been on lithium.

I'm not saying eating babies should be legal, but when they're so delicious, what's the harm in it? I don't know what tastes better, their innocence or their gooey rib butter.

I was excited about The Dark Knight until Heath Ledger gave away the ending, Batman always wins.

Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter