I find my movie props in my neighbors houses.

Everyone has a warped vision of Hollywood and what success in Hollywood is like.

The problem with doing commercials is that the only thing good enough for me to sell is myself, and I stopped doing that once I kicked my coke habit.

I've never had much sympathy for orphans, I mean, when I was their age I would have killed to have no parents to make me clean my room and stuff

It's trust issue more than anything. I mean, whats stopping them from teaming up, dressing up like a really tall person in a trenchcoat, and then BAM. They sneak out with all your furniture

Yea, he's alright...but he's no Zach Braff.

They don't know I'm staring, what does it matter if I keep on doing it?