Once both gay marriage and marijuana are finally legal, those of you against them are not invited to the really fun parties I'm gonna throw.

I find it hard to believe that so many people doubt the existence of God. I mean, seriously, I'm here, so is it such a stretch to imagine that another all-powerful being could exist somewhere in the universe?

My co-stars aren't bad actors, but they're no Zach Braff.

Yea, I had a dream too. Looks like mine came true.

At this point I feel like I could go out and accomplish anything. I'd just love to see Will Smith's face if he found out I, Z-Braff, have the number one rap album in the country. That'd show that no-talent uncle tom.

Its not that I'm in love with myself, I'm just trying to pick up everyone else's slack.

Of course killing people is 'wrong', but I think history shows that sometimes it serves the greater good.