Ya know, Hitler was this evil, evil man. But with the World Bank and Israel manipulating America, he might have been on to something.

My mother's a psychologist, my stepfather's a psychologist, my stepmother is a therapist and my dad's a lawyer. So it was all prominent in my life. I don't know anyone who doesn't know someone on some form of prescription medicine.

Am I really gonna deny someone the opportunity of a lifetime just because they met me 5 easters early?

Minutes to learn, a lifetime to master. People just don't understand that

Honestly, the only way Garden State could have been better was if I played every character. I'm awesome.

Without me, Scrubs would be worse than the holocaust. But with me in it, it's turned into the lolocaust.

Prohibition didn't work, so why should emancipation work? I think we should just stick with a system that has proven to be effective.