My co-stars aren't bad actors, but they're no Zach Braff.

It's not that I'm racist or anything, because I'm not, but I just don't think we should be wasting our time helping people that are going to die soon anyway.

Yeah i thought about making the character of JD gay... But then i thought, but what about all the poor girls dreams you'll be crushing

I don't want to blame it all on 9/11, but it certainly didn't help matters.

Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter

At first, I didn't really care if global warming existed. But then I realized it means that less bums would freeze to death in the winter

So for front-runners we have a black and a woman. It's like being made to choose between syphilis or having and old man crap on your face. I would do the country a favor and run myself but I couldn't deprive Hollywood of me for 4 years.