Reciting lines is hard; making stuff up is much, much easier.
If you see something, say something.
Actually, I used to be a busboy in a strip joint in New York and so I hate strip joints. I'm not that kind of person.
My father used to beat me with his belt...while it was still on him.
It's not good for comedy to be like, 'Thanks for liking me'. Being popular is poison.
The problem with these interviews is that there's no sarcastic font.