I'm like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.

There's no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I'm a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.

Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.

You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.

My motto is "more mystery, less history".

People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.

Well, guys are better at mechanical stuff and women are better at emotional stuff.