All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.

I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.

When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!

When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the 'tardiest of the 'tards like the thick crust.

My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.

I don't burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.

I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.