If you spend your life walking through somebody else's museum, you never find out whether you're Rembrandt or not.

No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians; I'm just not a reader.

I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.

If you're conservative in Hollywood, you're on a list of people who need to be put in their place.

You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.

If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.

I used to be a Democrat, now I'm basically a Republican.