Let's not let a few dumb things Mitt Romney said in private overshadow the many idiotic things he's said in public.
Andy BorowitzRemember, no matter how hard your life is right now, it would be worse if a song by Chicago was playing.
Andy BorowitzThe only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.
Andy BorowitzCall me a dreamer, but I think it would be great if getting medical attention were as easy as getting a gun.
Andy Borowitz