Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a "religious" meaning.
Andy BorowitzSarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part.
Andy BorowitzRick Perry is qualified to be President in the same way that Olive Garden is qualified to be Italy.
Andy BorowitzThe only possible reason the Republicans have declared a war on women is they must think women have oil.
Andy Borowitz