It used to be that people could be painfully boring in private. Facebook changed all that.
Andy BorowitzRick Perry is qualified to be President in the same way that Olive Garden is qualified to be Italy.
Andy BorowitzAll Americans mourn the passing of the author of the Declaration of Independence, George Jefferson.
Andy BorowitzChristmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday.
Andy Borowitz