A Romney presidency will be awesome unless you're poor, sick, gay, female, Mexican or a dog.
Andy BorowitzMaybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one.
Andy BorowitzTo mark the hundredth anniversary of the Titanic, the Republicans have nominated Mitt Romney.
Andy BorowitzWelcome delegates to the 2012 Republican Convention! Remember to set your watches back 400 years.
Andy Borowitz