To mark the hundredth anniversary of the Titanic, the Republicans have nominated Mitt Romney.
Andy BorowitzI make the modest proposal that psychiatric care should be as easy to get as bullets at Wal-Mart.
Andy BorowitzEvery week Republicans are excited about a new candidate because the one they liked last week turned out to be a moron.
Andy BorowitzYou can return all the Christmas gifts you want, but you will never get back the time spent with your relatives.
Andy Borowitz