Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter.

Those to whom his word was revealed were always alone in some remote place, like Moses. There wasn't anyone else around when Mohammed got the word either. Mormon Joseph Smith and Christian Scientist, Mary Baker Eddy, had exclusive audiences with God. We have to trust them as reporters--and you know how reporters are. They'll do anything for a story.

In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.

We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.

Anyone should be very suspicious of a sentence he's written that can't be read aloud easily.

People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.

You're almost always better off keeping your mouth shut, but don't let that stop you from popping off.